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Flick Wit - August 2007

So much for the Sex and the City secret! Michael Patrick King has been thwarted in his desire to be Harry Potter-esque about his script for the upcoming SATC movie, as reports emerged in the last 48 hours of leaked storyline details.

SJP to bare all? Image courtesy of celebrityweek.com


As yet, there has been no official word on the leak, and Sarah Jessica Parker is refusing to comment on rumours that she has agreed to full-frontal nudity in one scene, after being the only principal cast member not to be filmed naked from the waist up during the series.

Other whispers suddenly circulating are that Big (Chris Noth) has a mid-life crisis that doesn’t follow the usual course; Stanford (Willie Garson) cheats on Marcus with Anthony (Mario Cantone) even though they hate each other; Samantha (Kim Cattrall) takes up cyber-sex while Smith (Jason Lewis) is in Europe on the set of his new movie, and encounters a hermaphrodite; Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) is mortified when she has a Janet Jackson moment and accidentally flashes several staff members at Brady’s pre-school; and Charlotte (Kristen Davis) discovers she loses her poise when it comes to parenting.

Sarah Jessica Parker. Courtesy of countryduchess.com


Reports are mixed concerning the new events in the life of Parker’s character, Carrie Bradshaw. Several say her high-school boyfriend, Jeremy, played by Californication star David Duchovny, re-enters her life with a marriage proposal, after having resolved his issues, while others say she stays with Big, but turns down his proposal.

Most accounts say we meet Carrie’s mother for the first time, in the form of 63 year old ex-model Lauren Hutton. She is said to have found sexual rejuvenation with a man younger than herself, and in fact, younger than Carrie.

Lauren Hutton. Courtesy of askmen.com

Apparently, although the series finished original broadcasts in 2004, the movie is set less than two years later in the characters’ lives. Nevertheless, it will still feature all the most up-to-date social ideas, haute couture and New York hot-spots.

Michaelie Clark



Please note: This entire post is a complete fabrication. It is merely the result of resolute day-dreaming, which I wrote to amuse myself, and, I hope, you as well. I am entirely convinced that the real SATC movie will exceed any expectations I, or anyone else, have, or I’ll eat my Yves Saint Laurent vintage cloche hat.
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Big-time Hollywood actor, director and producer – it doesn’t look like this seventy-seven year old will be lining up for the pension any time soon. Quite simply, the man is a legend, and it’s hard to find anything bad, or ugly, about him. The grey hair and craggy face just seem to add to his enduring appeal.

A Hot Young Harry. Courtesy of film.guardian.co.uk

Eastwood soared to international fame in the mid-sixties for a trio of Spaghetti-Westerns, A Fist Full of Dollars, For A Few Dollars More, and of course, The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. But it was the Dirty Harry movies in the seventies, in which he played the title role, which immortalised him. As Harry Callahan, Eastwood was something else. With stony expression and a ruthless sense of morality, he delivered such famous lines as “Go ahead, make my day”.

Decades later, Eastwood is still going strong. He had Mystic River in 2003, where he displayed his directing skills to maximum effect, and followed it up with Million Dollar Baby the year after, winning the Best Picture Oscar and the Academy Award for Best Director.

A more elderly Eastwood. Courtesy of californiamuseum.org

And now he has achieved a remarkable double, something rarely done, and seldom done successfully. He made two movies showing the same story from two different sides, with Flags of Our Fathers and Letters from Iwo Jima. Somehow, the man manages to convince his audience of the heroism, and the humanity, of the Allies and the Japanese respectively. Iwo Jima is a stunning movie and a true testament to the power of Eastwood. The script was originally written in English before being fully translated into Japanese, but even without the use of subtitles, the message gets across. It truly speaks for itself.

Michaelie Clark
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Give 'Em The Old 'Razzle Dazzle'

August 27th 2007 07:06
Kerry Armstrong was never more brilliant than when she played Heather Jelly in SeaChange; however, her performance in this li’l Aussie production comes a close second.

Kerry Armstrong dazzles. Courtesy of writeaway.net

The mockumentary follows two dance instructors who are engaged in fierce competition, Miss Elizabeth and Mr Jonathan, brilliantly portrayed by Jane Hall and Ben Miller. Miss Elizabeth is uptight, driven and convinced of her superiority. Mr Jonathan on the other hand, is awkward and humble, with a skewed but well-intentioned social conscience reminiscent of a less satirical Chris Lilley. While Miss Elizabeth’s pupils perfect their pas de chat, Mr Jonathan’s crew perform the Dance of the Sweat Shop Workers, to incongruous comic effect.

Meanwhile, three mothers are moving to a rhythm of their own. Justine Morgan (Armstrong) is the pushy parent of Tenille (Shayni Notelovitz), a student in Mr Jonathan’s class. She is an acrylic-nailed, fake-tanned, stiletto-shod monster of a mummy, devoting every waking moment to ensuring her daughter realises her ambitions – and eats her toast dry. Paulette Gibson (Nadine Garner), mother of Grace (Clancy Ryan) is far removed from Justine. She battles along, doing the best she can as a single mother, despite the constraints of time and complications of an ex-husband with a boyfriend. And then there’s Mr Jonathan’s assistant, Barbara Gibbs (Denise Roberts), who will do anything to be the mother of a child-star – even if it means kidnapping someone else’s.

As the Sanosafe Troupe Spectacular looms, Australian comedy proves itself once more. Razzle Dazzle is a shining, sequinned delight made all the better for being a bit off-beat.

Michaelie Clark


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The Devil... Is Anne Hathaway

August 25th 2007 03:04
What do you get when you make a highly entertaining novel into a film with a drop-dead gorgeous cast? A highly lifeless movie, apparently. Anne Hathaway is still playing princess – and becoming a right royal pain in the sceptre. Her wan, uninspired performance in The Devil Wears Prada leeches the sass and humour from her character, Andy Sacks, making her seem both contrived and undistinguished.

Away with you, Hathaway! Courtesy of popcornreel.com

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What's Next For Sex?

August 24th 2007 04:27
Forget the Sphinx, Jack the Ripper, and the question of why two socks go into the wash and only one comes out: all I want to know is… what’s the plot of the Sex and the City movie? This closely guarded secret is a mystery many a gal wants solved, but if Michael Patrick King has anything to say about it – and he’s not saying a word – we won’t have any leads for a while yet.

Oh, those Sexy girls! Courtesy of hbo.com

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Lights, Camera, Action!

August 23rd 2007 04:24
Welcome to Hollywood! Not to mention my brand new blog. Previously a girl more adept at trivia nights than websites, I am now taking my first step into cyberspace – and hoping I don’t encounter a black hole.

I plan to post reviews on actors, directors, old movies, new movies, and sometimes, reviews on movies that haven’t happened yet. I figure I’ll just have to use my imagination there. Moreover, I will be endeavouring to do this with dazzling humour and sparkling wit, proving myself to be enchantingly entertaining. At the very least, I hope I won’t inspire mass hatred – unless it’s directed at some other poor cretin. I have no desire to be Mega-Bitten on the behind. I want no Spy Ware following me home, setting Fire to my Walls and throwing Paint bombs at my Windows. That’s just not the Modem of living I’m up for. I am, however, open to learning more about Cookies


[ Click here to read more ]
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