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While The French Kissers – or Les Beaux Gosses (the original French title meaning ‘The Handsome Guys’) – doesn’t follow a well constructed plot as such; still, it is an enchanting rendezvous into the lives of a group of misfit teens from the north-west of France. The narrative tends to suit the protagonists, who have an aimless disinterest in most things in their lives, with the primary exception of relations with the opposite sex.

The French Kissers
Herve and Camel - Image courtesy of frenchfilmfestival.co.nz



“She’s hot, her eyes are blue as detergent.”

Hervé (Vincent Lacoste) is an unfortunate looking middle school student who lives alone with his mother (Noémie Lvovsky), a depressive and unconventional woman whose takes gleeful delight in discomfiting her son and interfering in his life, often bursting in upon him, grinning maniacally, wanting to know if he is masturbating.

“I gave birth to you.”
“You can’t jerk off in peace around here!”

This he does frequently, into a sock, and often in tandem with his best friend Camel (Anthony Sonigo), an Arabic boy with a long fly-away mullet, a fondness for denim vests and an obsession with the lingerie section of the mail order catalogues he took from his grandmother’s house after her death.


La Redoute 1986, page 320, lingerie, is on the couch.”
“That one’s mine!”

Together with the rest of their crew of oddballs, they spend their time eating bananas, playing Dungeons and Dragons, conjuring Hitler in séance to ask for forecasts of their sex lives, and most importantly, trying to ‘lock lips’ with any jeune fille who takes their fancy.

“I’ll hook Laura, Arabic style.”

Hervé’s girl of choice is Aurore (Alice Trémolières). She is pretty and popular and enjoys shoplifting immensely, and, much to everyone’s surprise, returns Hervé’s attentions. They embark upon a turbulent relationship. Aurore is hot and cold toward Hervé, who desperately wants to have sex but is often aloof when it is offered. He is terribly unchivalrous towards Aurore at times, and is put off at one point after he sees her dirty feet.

The French Kissers French Film
Herve practices in front of/with the mirror - Image courtesy of mubi.com

“When I look at shoe creases, I know if a chick has pretty feet.”

To his friends, however, he is very possessive. Full of unfounded male arrogance and self-assurance of his sexual prowess, he boasts of his affair to Camel, who is eager to hear every detail of Hervé’s sexual experience, not knowing that the closest he’s come to actual intercourse is ejaculating in his jeans while kissing Aurore on her bed.

“You jerked off on me?”
“No. I mean yes… I’m sorry, I couldn’t stop, your pupil was so dilated.”

“I hope you use condoms.”
“Sure, I even used two once, so I’m safe.”
“I was like that.”

“It’s kinda like the inside of a nostril.”
“And a pointy thing enters your cock?”

The boys are odd and incredibly awkward, with little decorum, but then most of the characters in the film are, including the girls and even their teachers. None of the teenagers cast in the film are trained actors, which lends a sense of reality, complete with braces and oily skin.

The French Kissers Kiss
Herve's first kiss with Aurore - Image courtesy of abc.net.au

“Hey, it’s my snogging style. Everyone has to have their own style. Thank God we’re all different.”

“The movement keeps the drool in. There’s a current, like a boat with a propeller.”

The ending lets the film down slightly, as it jumps to high school and shows a snap shot of how everything has turned out, but it doesn’t detract from the movie greatly. Overall, it’s a terrific debut from writer/director Riad Sattouf, and is one of the most unpretentiously funny and charmingly absurd films I have seen of late, with several moments that had me laughing in a highly raucous manner.

Michaelie Clark
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It appears Tim Burton may be taking up his magic wand once more to direct a remake of another children’s classic – Sleeping Beauty. Entitled Maleficent, the remake will purportedly focus on the evil fairy’s turbulent past, which led her to curse a certain princess to a century of snoozing.

Angelina Jolie as Maleficent


Delightful as Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter are, the world could no doubt handle a Burton film without their presence, so rumours that Angelina Jolie will take up the role of Maleficent are pleasing. With her dark, edgy beauty and capacity for wildness, she would surely do well as the captivatingly wicked fairy – though I can’t see Jolie transforming into a dragon any time soon.

Michaelie Clark
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Mesmerising Movie Men

March 25th 2010 09:25
Well, we’ve had a look-see at the enchanting ladies, now for some fascinating fellows! Those with an intensity and magnetism that radiates off the screen and shimmers through your innards. Those who put the rhythm in your sound stripe or make your plot thicken… Ahem.

Marlon Brando
Marlon Brando - Image courtesy of cache.eb.com

Richard Armitage
Richard Armitage - Image courtesy of wordpress.com

John Malkovich
John Malkovich - Image courtesy of wordpress.com

Michael Cera
Michael Cera - Image courtesy of collider.com

Robert Redford
Robert Redford - Image courtesy of collider.com

Christian Bale
Christian Bale - Image courtesy of provocateuse.com

Paul Newman
Paul Newman - Image courtesy of tinypic.com

Ralph Fiennes
Ralph Fiennes - Image courtesy of art.com

Clint Eastwood
Clint Eastwood - Image courtesy of listal.com

James McAvoy
James McAvoy - Image courtesy of taragana.com

Tom Long
Tom Long - Image courtesy of theage.com.au

Actor versus captor of the senses: which film wizard puts a twist in your gizzard?

Michaelie Clark
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Fascinating Film Femmes

February 17th 2010 07:00
In life, there is a notable distinction between beautiful and sensuous, agreeable and challenging, engaging and captivating. But when an actor is blessed with a sensuous, challenging and captivating spirit, the effect is magnified, as it imbues the characters they portray.

Some actors are merely on film, others have true screen presence. They have that je ne sais quoi, an evocative magnetism that is at once so difficult to grasp and yet impossible to deny


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A friend of mine was recently walking down Collins Street when she saw Bill Hunter coming towards her. She watched him approach with mild curiosity, having grown up watching him on the big screen. As he came closer she began to wonder what the appropriate reaction was to strolling past Muriel’s dad while on her lunch break. It seemed rude to ignore him. On the other hand, greeting him would be a mite strange given that their acquaintance was hitherto one-sided.

In the end, they passed by each other with several uncomfortable seconds of awkward eye contact. She was still peering at him uncertainly, trying to ascertain the etiquette of the situation. He was eyeing her warily, in response to her uncertain peering


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Then or Now?

June 8th 2009 08:11
Who passed their screen-life and curdled early, and who only got better as they ripened on the reel? It’s as easy to romanticise the past as it is to focus only on what is familiar to us in the present day. I think the well-known actors listed below are a mix of those who have taken a more relaxed, less ambitious view of their career after roles for which they will be forever remembered, those who are as steady as ever, and those who are still climbing, and for whom the best may be yet to come.

Sean Connery: James Bond to King Arthur
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Lead Me Into Temptation...

March 29th 2009 07:13
Danger is an alluring thing. I know I’m not alone. Why else do people have sex in public, surf trains and/or wear six-inch heels? I tell you, it’s the irresistibility of a risky situation.

It should be no surprise then, to find that villains are quite regularly more appealing than heroes. It’s a given for the ladies – femme fatales like Bond’s Xenia Onatopp and O-ren Ishii of Kill Bill are by definition attractive and overtly seductive. With the men, it’s not always so obvious. Is it simply that evil often seems to be paired with wit and charm, or is the danger of wickedness itself enough to tempt us to the dark side


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Flick Wit in a Flash: Richard Armitage

December 21st 2008 19:03
Richard Armitage: a villain in a jerkin; a hero without a cravat; a romantic, a comic, a wicked, heavenly, sensual, tenderly menacing god!

Ahem


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How often do you replace DVD rentals on the shelf due to their rating? Is it because that rating is too high, or too low? Have you bypassed a film, heedless of all else, because the spine of the cover indicates it contains an explicit scene? What if you picked up a PG rated adaptation of Lady Chatterley’s Lover? Would you put it back, assuming the content had been compromised? Likewise a film that has been re-edited and re-released in order to downgrade from R 18 to the more accessible MA 15 ?

G Rated

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It’s still a field very much dominated by the males of the movie world, but when it comes to the direction of films, the ladies are definitely turning a corner. Since Dorothy Arzner, many women have taken their place in the director’s chair, often exploring – among other things – politics, sexuality, identity and humour, and in the process have examined, deconstructed, and created their way into a whole new dimension of cinema.

Here are ten female directors who have shown us their view through the lens


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Stop-Loss: Close, But No Salute

September 8th 2008 18:33
While not usually the type of film I would gravitate towards, I found myself seeing Stop-Loss with something approaching mild anticipation. I was somewhat intrigued by the controversial plot concept, and wanted to see what Joseph Gordon-Levitt could pull out of the hat. I’d read a few decent reviews, was interested by the presence of Timothy Olyphant in a uniform, and was ultimately convinced by the front-line involvement of Aussie actress Abbie Cornish and Boys Don’t Cry director Kimberly Peirce.

Ryan Phillippe
Ryan Phillippe as the dishonourable hero - Image courtesy of metro.co.uk

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This post marks one year to the minute since Flick Wit nudged its way into the virtual Orb, with what was effectively an apology for the hiccups that were surely to come. Luckily, there were plenty of people around willing to slap me on the back, coerce me into drinking water backwards, and sometimes, jump out from darkened corners and scare the bejesus out of me. So the hiccups were kept (for the most part) at bay, and I could get on with the business of shamelessly self-indulgent writing.

Johnny Depp
My birthday present - No, Trace, you may not have a piece. Image courtesy of publishersweekly.com

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All Hail Meryl

July 20th 2008 17:33
Against all odds, the more mature, intelligent and sophisticated ladies are still holding their own in Hollywood at the moment. Among the ranks of Dames Helen Mirren and Judi Dench, Glenn Close and Annette Bening is of course one of the most elegant and enduring of them all – Meryl Streep.

QUOTE: It's hard to negotiate the present landscape with a brain and a female body.
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Self-Help to Rom-Com

June 30th 2008 18:03
Yet another Hollywood development I cannot understand – how does a self-help book, inspired by a scene in a television series, wind up being developed into a romantic film? Has Hollywood run out of sequels to plan? Classics to remake? Comic strips, TV shows and singers’ biographies to adapt? Heaven forbid.

Jennifer Aniston
Jennifer Aniston - Image courtesy of nymag.com

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